In terms of community memberships that have altered my general behaviour and social identity the most recent membership I have gained is of the student feminist community, not just within my university but also on a national level.
Although, instead of transforming my social identity or creating a new one, this community membership has strengthened one aspect of my political beliefs and inflated it to an extent where it has become a large part of how I see myself and maybe even how others see me. Involvement in feminist activism has leaded me to discover the feminist community at large, and within this I have felt strong connections with the other demonstrators who I barely knew. This strong feeling of “sisterhood” has encouraged me to communicate with feminist organisations and network with other feminist groups. Being the leader of UCLan’s feminist society brings about feelings of responsibility and pride, as well as anxiety and stress. Many of my previous friendships I formed in my first year now view me as “Janine the Feminist” as well as members of my Student Union.
My experiences within the group have drastically affected some ritual activities which used to be a part of my life but which I have dropped. For example, traditionally “feminine” rituals such as shaving of the body and the application of make-up, and also spending time on straitening/curling my hair have been dropped almost completely (apart from nights out drinking, for a treat). Although this is not in any way a requirement when joining the feminist community, it made me feel personally that decorating my body in such a way was not appropriate for me anymore.
Membership into this community has also encouraged me to put certain restrictions on my social life. For instance there are certain pubs and clubs that I no longer attend due to the attitudes and actions taken by those people who own them which were misogynist. I have also noticed that it has affected the way I communicate with people in general and how I form bonds. I now find it harder to form friendships with those who do not sympathise with the feminist movement, and I now realise that I would not be interested in dating someone who did not identify as a feminist. Yet again, this is not mandatory for student feminists, it is a personal decision I put upon myself.
Before I joined university my male friends would often tell “kitchen” jokes and other sexist comments in front of me and I would not react and simply ignore it, but now if people are to tell me jokes like that I am more likely to react. I am now more likely to stand up for myself if I am harassed in a public place, or stand up for a female friend if she experiences harassment.
I suppose what I find interesting about this personal change I have made to the ways in which I socialise and communicate with people, as well as the way I decorate my body are changes that have come from within, and not changes that were compulsory for my group membership. The feminist group I am a part of is very diverse in terms of bodily decoration, political beliefs (other than feminism), sexualities and gender, and we seem to be untied through a general belief in women’s equality rather than a strict set of values and behaviours.
I feel that rather than have adopting a new identity altogether, I feel like I have “discovered myself”. This is because I have entered an environment and met people who have encouraged me to further my interest in feminism, and I am now in a place where I feel I do not have to decorate myself in accordance to the male gaze in order to feel accepted as a woman.
